Listen up, dickhead, if u have a problem with getting a degree by doing no work then bloody well keep it to yourself, damn communist, because I am quite happy with mediocrity --Letter in Honi Soit. (August 28, 2005)

    The other day The Sydney Morning Herald's Julia Baird hared off to The University of Sydney after considering the recent decisions by two ministers of the crown, Tony Abbott and Brendan Nelson -- based on New South Wales police advice, that their safety might be in jeopardy should they attend functions at Sydney university campuses.

She was intent on "scour[ing] copies of this semester's Honi Soit, the famously irreverent, satirical and political student newspaper, which can boast among its former editors Clive James, Laurie Oakes, Donald Horne, Robert Hughes, Germaine Greer and Les Murray. It is usually a good indication of where the politically active students are at."

Ms Baird reports that rather than ploughing through  rabble-rousing, wild-eyed radical rhetoric, she was surprised at "how sensible and sober most of the writing was. It read like a mainstream publication", though it might have done with a bit of sub-editing. And while she opines "there was a preoccupation with pop culture, from paeans to Delta Goodrem to critiques of Desperate Housewives ("Excuse me for thinking that post-postfeminism looks an awful lot like
pre-pre feminism"), and analysis of Dr Phil ("just the sage for a very anxious age"), there were also "a condemnation of violence in protests and serious articles on global warming, women's rights, African aid and student debt."

Keeping in mind the Minister for Education, Science and Training, Brendan Nelson's, crusade in bringing Australian universities and its non "right-thinking" students to heel, Baird dug deeper and found "the most interesting pieces came from disgruntled students who were worried about the quality of their education." (our emphasis).

One "wrote about his disappointment with his economics degree. His problem is not just the limited government funding and overcrowded lecture halls, but the low standards. He wrote: 'The biggest failing of this university is the incredibly low criteria it sets for gaining a degree. The sad reality is that the university doesn't expect much from its students, and the consequence is that most of us then live up to this "do the bare minimum" stereotype.'"

Graduate law student Henriette Kelso complained of "overcrowded classrooms, the 1:50 student teacher ratio … no class discussion … and an exam that's worth 60 per cent of your assessment".

And Dr Nelson and his cohort of ministers can twist and spin and be as glib as is their wont, but it doesn't alter the fact the government's grinding down of the university sector is the chief culprit responsible for the decline in the "products" dispensed by our universities.

Oh, yes, there is that eloquently sardonic rejoinder to the complaint of, "The biggest failing of this university is the incredibly low criteria it sets for gaining a degree."

Listen up, dickhead, if u have a problem with getting a degree by doing no work then bloody well keep it to yourself, damn communist, because I am quite happy with mediocrity.

Right on lad/lass, you got all the makings of a Federal Minister for... Education?